Day 12

Dear Wolfgang,

Today you just want to be held. You’ve been doing so well sleeping in your bassinet and crib, but this evening you cry after a few minutes each time we lie you down. Your daddy and I have been taking turns rocking you and singing to you. I wish we knew what was upsetting you. We’ve made sure you have a clean nappy, are warm and have had your fill of breastmilk. We’ve burped you, we’ve raised your legs and gently bent your knees to relieve wind, and we’ve soothed you. But still you wake up screaming as if in pain.

The only time you seemed happy to stay asleep today was when I wore you in the baby carrier, so maybe you just wanted to be close and hear my heartbeat. Or perhaps being upright helped with the wind and/or reflux. Or maybe it was just a coincidence and your body finally had a break from whatever discomfort you were feeling.

I’ve never felt quite as helpless as when you scream and I don’t know how to make it better. I know there will be many things in your life that I won’t be able to fix for you, but for now, I’ll fix what I can.

1 thought on “Day 12

  1. Hello Krystal this reminds me of when Chanté had silent reflux as a baby. After feeding when I put Chanté to sleep she would scream because the gastric juices would burn the oesophagus. I think I nearly went crazy not knowing what was wrong & the intense screaming. I finally took her to hospital for assistance in finding out what was wrong. It was a huge relief finding out that I was not going mad & that there was a genuine physical reason why she was crying. And then we were able to deal with it which were some simple steps to heal the burnt oesophagus & have a happy baby again. We put the bed on a 30° angle & after feeding always making sure she was always vertical or on a 30° angle.
    I pray Wolfgang doesn’t have reflux or silent reflux. Chanté slept about 4hours only in a 24 hour period for the first 4-5 months. You could see her brain thinking about everything she saw & wondering what they were. We shared many very precious moments.

    What ever happens with Wolfgang, you both may be a little sleep deprived at first , but you will learn to adapt & share many precious moments because of it. Xo

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